In the last YES! Your Human Resources Solution blog, we talked about how to effectively deliver four difficult HR conversations. But difficult conversations extend beyond Human Resources to small-business owners, managers, supervisors, and throughout the entire business world. So this week we’re offering pointers on how to make these difficult business conversations go more smoothly.

• Don’t put it off. You would rather speak to an auditorium filled with people than have this one difficult conversation; just thinking about it makes your palms sweaty and your stomach flutter. You’re waiting for the stars to align and create the perfect time to tackle this toughie. So you put it off another day, and then another. But putting off a difficult conversation won’t make it any less difficult, and in fact, waiting may exacerbate the situation or put the company at risk. Plus nobody likes to feel those awful stomach flutters day after day. So dive in and request a time to “meet,” “chat,” or “problem-solve.” It may help to provide some context to frame the conversation, so there will be an understanding of what to expect at the meeting.
• Know your end game. Before you sit down to meet, make sure you know what you want the conversation to achieve. Identify the cause of the problem and how the problem is affecting colleagues, clients, and the company. You should be able to articulate this in a few easy sentences. Then figure out the conversation’s desired outcomes. What should the other person agree to do? What level of support will you provide? When will you meet again to check on progress?
• Be direct. When the meeting arrives, you could hem and haw, use soft words, and apologize for having this conversation at all, but that will only weaken your message. Sometimes the best way to deliver a tough message is clearly and simply: “I want to talk about some of the issues with the AcmeCorp account, and discuss ways we can problem-solve.” If you’ve provided some context during your meeting request, this message will not blindside the other person. When you’re discussing topics such as performance issues or personal habits, your opening sentence should come across as a well-meaning effort to work together to improve the situation. Keep things respectful, positive, and solution-driven—the conversation should never feel like a reprimand or an inquisition.
• Anticipate emotional responses. While you cannot dictate how the other person will react to a difficult conversation, if you’re presenting the conversation in a respectful, positive, and solution-driven way, you can minimize negative emotional responses. You should still anticipate and prepare yourself for an emotional response, which may include arguments, denial, blame, or even tears. That way you can keep your own emotions in check, remembering to stay calm, civil, and professional at all times. You can also remain focused and work to keep the conversation on track. That doesn’t mean you don’t have to ignore an emotional response; sometimes a more productive approach is to acknowledge the response, allow the person time to cool down and regroup, and then recognize that the reaction stems from a problem to be addressed.

A proper approach can make any difficult conversation go a little easier. By staying focused and professional, you can work toward your end game in a respectful, positive, and solution-driven manner. At the end of the conversation, you’ll not only be relieved it’s over, you might even be pleased with where things could go!